In the beginning, the first institution God ever created was not government, not business, not even the church as we know it, but marriage. Genesis 2:18 tells us of God’s intention when He said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” That divine statement laid the foundation of the union between man and woman, one of companionship, not rivalry. The Lord Himself likened marriage to the ultimate relationship between Christ and the Church, with Christ as the groom and the Church as His bride.
Yet in today’s world, that holy design faces a quiet but destructive war. According to the Annual Vital Statistics Report, Eswatini recorded 395 divorces in 2023, an alarming number for a small nation. But these figures should not become the only lens through which we view marriage. What concerns me more is the growing hostility between men and women, a tension most visible on social media. Too often, men and women are not meeting as partners but as adversaries.
This invisible battle is fueled by pain, pain from broken trust, traumatic experiences, and unhealed wounds. Young women, often shaped by betrayal or abuse, speak with anger against men. Many men, equally scarred, respond with resentment of their own. The result is a cycle of blame where each gender clutches red pens, tallying who has hurt the other more. But I am not speaking here of criminals or those who intentionally inflict harm. I am speaking of ordinary men and women, caught in the web of mutual disappointment and mistrust.
As believers, we cannot afford to be part of this rivalry. Our relationships must model something different, love that reflects Christ’s love for us. Saints should be the first to show that forgiveness, respect, and compassion are possible even in a fractured world. Yes, people hurt each other in relationships, but responding by carrying grudges only deepens the wounds. Grudges rarely harm the person who hurt us, they harm the one who holds them. Hurt people hurt people, and unless we heal, we risk passing our pain onto our children and shaping a generation of bitterness.
It is time to choose healing over hostility. Let us forgive ourselves and those who have wronged us. Let us refuse to be mobilized into virtual mobs or online trolling wars. Instead, let us walk as Christ’s messengers of love and light, bringing peace into our homes and communities. This is not naïve idealism. It is obedience to a higher calling.
This Sunday Coffee is a reminder: marriage and companionship were designed to complement, not compete. Let us return to that truth, for in choosing healing and forgiveness, we create not only stronger relationships but a stronger nation. Until we meet again, keep walking.
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