In this maiden edition of Sunday Coffee With Siphiwo Lushaba, one lesson many African boys grow up learning is that men do not cry. From an early age, young men are reminded that tears are a weakness, that vulnerability strips away their masculinity. The message is clear: whatever the pain, soldier on, stay strong, and never show emotion. Beneath the surface, this conditioning has left a trail of unspoken wounds.
Today, many men feel unseen, unappreciated, and judged solely by the weight of their possessions. A man without wealth is rarely considered of value in our communities, regardless of the integrity of his journey or the depth of his character. The question we must ask ourselves is whether society has pushed men too far—whether our obsession with material markers of success has silenced men’s voices and devalued their humanity.
The truth is men are afraid. Afraid of opening up because, in their experience, their confessions are too often used against them. This is not confined to romantic relationships—it runs deeper into families, workplaces, and entire communities. A man reporting abuse or rape is ridiculed rather than supported. Even in spaces meant to offer protection, including law enforcement, men often feel dismissed. The narrative has been that men are strong, men endure, men do not need support. Yet the reality paints another picture: prisons filled with broken men, psychiatric wards housing those who never got the chance to be heard.
It is time we ask if our societies offer men the same financial, emotional, and psychological support we readily extend to women. This is not a call to dismiss the very real struggles women face, but rather an invitation to build a balanced society—one where both genders are heard, healed, and empowered.
I believe healing is possible. Men can overcome childhood scars and adult traumas. We can reimagine communities that value both resilience and vulnerability. Eswatini can be a starting point, a place where the cycle of silence is broken and men are allowed to be whole again.
The Bible reminds us that when people humble themselves and turn to God, He heals their land. Perhaps healing our nation starts with listening to the silent cries of men and offering them room to breathe, to feel, and to grow.
Until next Sunday, keep walking.
Discussion about this post